Wow.

I knew it had been a while since I posted, but I hadn't realized it was a week. I tend to slack off on the updated when I slack off on doing good. I don't like posting about my failures. I guess that's why it surprises me that I haven't posted since last monday; I did good till Wednesday. Then it all went downhill.

Wednesday night, we went out shopping late, so we ended up going out to eat. I didn't do too bad, I had salmon, broccoli, and rice. but then I stole some of Jon's dessert. No workout.

Thursday, I went with a friend to a nutrition class, and ended up signing up for a weight loss challenge there. I didn't do any workouts on this day, either.

As of right now, I can only say that I have lost my drive, or motivation. I just partly don't care. For now, we'll blame it on AF, and see how I feel by the end of the week. Sunday was Lauryn's birthday party, and we made ourselves sick on chocolate cake. It was so good.

About 30 minutes ago, I actually thought i was going to get up and do a workout. I think I'm going to abandon Jillian; not because she's kicking my ass, but because I don't really think she is. I guess I can't respect her if I can actually get all the way through the tape. Which, it makes me feel good to get through the tape, but knowing how long it has been since I've done any kind of workouts, and knowing that in the past when I start I can't get through 14 mins of whatever the tape is (and sometimes not even the warmup) Jillian is probably *perfect* right now, and I want something that will push me, and a challenge.

I need to get on a schedule. I feel like I need a stopwatch that goes off every 3 hours, so I remember to eat. and goes off at 4, so I will do a workout then, and then have time to take a shower. and then make Lauryn take a nap. and 8, so I can start work. and whatever time bedtime is. I should make a list of things I want to get done, and then see how much I can get done in 3 hours. When I get stuck on a knitting project, that's pretty much all I do all day, and then it feels like I didn't accomplish anything, even though I'm more than halfway through the project.

So, after all that rambling, if your still with me, the plan for this week is to get off AF and get some semblance of care back in my attitude. I have a one on one appointment tomorrow with the nutrition guy, and we need to make a run to the library for the kids books. I may or may not do a workout tomorrow. it all depends on AF. By the end of the week, we should have a bit of money in, and we are planning on renewing our membership at the gym and maybe going to the kung fu place and signing up for a family membership there. If we sign up on Friday, I'm hoping to go to a yoga class, maybe saturday and sunday, but we will see. I can't make plans too far in advance right now. Just got to get through this week in a holding pattern as far as everything goes.