I've struggled a lot, this week. I'm not sure what put me in a funk; the 1 month stall. The "newness" wearing off. I don't know. I went to yoga last Tuesday, and ended up walking out before it was over. It wasn't our usual instructor, it was someone filling in for her, and I just didn't like her style. I ended up doing intervals on the ellipitcal for about 10 minutes, which was… annoying. The machine would beep at me, and tell me to slow down, my heart rate was too fast; then it would go into "pause" mode because apparently I wasn't moving fast enough. Quite annoying.
anyway, we ended up skipping yoga on Thursday, because "our" instructor was still gone, and we weren't sure who would be teaching the class. I was in a funk on saturday morning, I don't really know why, but I didn't feel like doing anything then, so we didn't go to yoga then. I told Jon on Sunday that I wanted to start going to the gym on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, to do the treadmill or elliptical since I was only really doing stuff on Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday, even though Tuesday and Thursday will be twice a day. well, it didn't happen on Monday. and today? we didn't go to yoga. and I'm not going to kickboxing.
Its an evil, evil cycle. You don't go. for one reason or another. and then the next time, you don't feel like going, because you didn't go last time. and then on, and on and on and you don't FEEL like going because you DIDN"T GO! I just have to make myself do it. but tomorrow. I don't want kickboxing to be the first thing I do after a week off.
So, I need to do some research. I guess I need to keep a list of food ideas. I'm struggling with breakfast and lunch. Breakfast, I pretty much eat the same. thing. every. day. Which, I guess isn't so bad, but I need more veggies in my diet, and I can see getting them here. I should do more omlette type meals, or something. with lots of veggies. But I'm not an oatmeal eater, and I'll look forward to having pancakes and waffles once we get our grain and start grinding our own flour and doing kefir.
Lunch is..hard. If there isn't something left over from dinner the day before (like when I cook the chicken chili, its lunch and dinner times 3 days) then I struggle to know what to have. I don't want a sandwich, I need more veggies. but when we buy salad stuff, it usually goes bad before we can use it all. I prefer a hot meal (I'm sure that will change come hot weather). I end up just having a smoothie/meal replacement shake. (real fruit, real yogurt, protein powder, etc., nothing "bad")
One of my biggest struggles right now is the balance between self reliance and relying on someone else. I rely on jon for dinner. If I plan it in advance, I can do dinner. but you can't tell me "I don't feel like it today, can you?" and expect to eat anything other than dial-a-pizza. I just can't jump up and figure something out. I hope to overcome that; I hope to have a lot of things different. I'd tell you my pipe dream, but you'd probably laugh at me and/or call me to tell me how completely WRONG I'm doing everything, and I'm never going to succeed with my unrealistic intentions set in place.
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